I recently came across the movie Pitch Perfect on Netflix and decided to watch it for the second time. The movie ends with a cover of Don’t You (Forget About Me) by Simple Minds from The Breakfast Club soundtrack. The song prompted me to sift through how I’ve historically viewed the opinions of others. I’ve given far too much attention to what they say and think. Who are they and why have I chosen to forget about me? Why have I given them the leading role in my life story when I’m the only one with the real backstory?
It can be difficult to do this when you’ve been taught to always consider the needs and opinions of others before your own. The truth is we must know what we need and who we are before we can effectively meet the needs of others. Be prepared (in my Lion King voice)…those who believe your well-being is secondary to their desires will protest against your search for self in many ways. Those that care will either ask if they can support you or leave you alone to do what you need to do.
It’s important to remember that those who judge your boundary-setting designed to make space for personal healing aren’t malicious monsters. They’ve been taught how to treat you by your example. Simply put, what you’ve allowed creates space for their bad behavior. If they’re talking behind your back, they often need to talk about your life to give their own lives temporary meaning. In other words, those people judging you are already judging themselves, and are watching your life to take their mind off of their mediocre mayhem. On the other hand, the people who are busy living their own awesomely meaningful lives will usually be your cheerleaders and your teachers.
If you’re ready to find your why, your purpose, and your peace. If you’re ready to find You again try these rerouting re-connectors to discover your perfect fit.
The best way to remember what makes you feel like yourself is to reconnect to passion.
- Blog
- Journal
- Walk
- Run
- Give your heart
- Take your heart back
- Say yes
- Say no
- Learn
- Teach
- Donate and volunteer
- Eat the carbs
- Do a cleanse
- Make new friends
- Say goodbye to pseudo friends
- Look into spiritual practice
- Talk to a confidant
- Talk to a professional
Have you forgotten about You? The best way to remember what makes you feel like yourself is to reconnect to passion. Passion for laughter. Passion for joy. Passion for love. Passion for life. Passion for self.
If you or someone you know is looking for a way to remember who you were when you felt like the best version of yourself, or for a way to find that version for the first time, contact us at tanyikamoorehealingarts.com for resources or referrals.
By: Tanyika “Tann” Moore, LMFT
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